Thumpity!

Yay! I'm all set-up. Computer's together, monitor's here, and the speakers are all plugged in. I tell ya what, you haven't lived until you've watched a dvd from bed with the bass turned up (and the sub-woofer under the bed). Yeah!

So I'm geeking it up big time. Even joined a rpg site (not the computer games, an online version of table-top). For the non-geeky amoung you (who read blogs - yeah, you keep telling youself you're not a geek *rolls eyes*) RPG stands for role playing game.

I cooked my kangaroo roasts. They were damned delicious, though the first was a little chewy. The secret to good roo is either cook it very fast very hot, or cool and slow. The second was better. I cooked it at 150 degrees until still red in the middle (it's kangaroo, and to do it well done is a crime.

Made some great roo sandwiches with what was left. One with mixed greens, mayo (the real stuff heathens - you know with eggs, etc, not miscellaneous...stuff). If you can't make it yourself (like me) at least buy the goods, seeded mustard, grape tomatoes (they're cheap at the moment, and taste soooo good), and the roo cut finely. The other sandwich was good too. Vege roasted under the grill (I used capsicum, spanish onion, and added some broccoli for the last few minutes). Sweet potato or pumpkin would have been good too if I'd had any.

Mmmm, might just go and have another sandwich now. Yum!

Content? You can't handle the Content

OK *bites bullet* - this is a *drumroll* lesbian funny and cooking blog (the two go together - they will, I'll make them).

For my first post I will, errr, recycle content. This is an old joke, with the 'slob' addition added by someone off another forum, and the 'geek' addition done by me. Yes I'm a geek - well, more of a wanna be geek - but I have a blog now, that's gotta count for something =D.

Femme - If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant "fix-me-up."
Butch - If you over-salt a dish while you are cooking, that's too damn bad. Please recite with me The butch's motto: "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes."
Slob - Add some ramen and call it Miso Style.
Geek - Pfft, use an oven? I just use my overclocked microwave. Sure, my food explodes, but at least it's done faster than everyone else's.

Femme - Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.
Butch- Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink. You might still have the headache, but who the hell cares?
Slob - Take off glasses, clean, put back on. There you can see the computer/tv screen much better now and the headache should go away.
Geek - Adjust your earphone / mic / headset with one hand, while still chatting, surfing the web, and downloading questionable material with the other.

Femme - Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.
Butch- Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake. You are probably lying on the couch, with your feet up anyway.
Slob - Lick it off your t-shirt later.
Geek - Just use the icecream from your overclocked freezer. Yeah, you have to use a hammer and chisel to get it out the tub, but it's not going to melt in a hurry.
"*Arghh! brain freeze."
"Hehe - Cool, I'm gonna try that again."

Femme - To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.
Butch- Buy boxed mashed potato mix and you don't have to worry about the potatoes growing arms and legs.
Slob - Let 'em grow, free potatoes in four weeks.
Geek - Potatoes? They're those things that potato chips are made from, right?

Femme - When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white powdery mess on the bottom of the cake.
Butch- Go to the bakery - they'll even decorate it for you.
Slob - better still, just eat the cake mix raw.
Geek - did you know that you can make flour explode into a huge fireball under the right conditions... here's how.

Femme - Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.
Butch- Sara Lee frozen pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over anything, so don't do it.
Slob - the gas station down the road sells them already baked!
Geek - pi = 3.1415926535897932384626433832795

Femme - If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dish washing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars easy.
Butch- Go ask the very HOT neighbor to do it. Even though you know that you could open it if you really wanted to.
Slob - Use tire iron to prise off lid... and eat contents with.
Geek - You have a special jar opening device for just this occasion, if only you could find it.

And finally the most important tip....

Femme- Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.
Butch - Leftover wine?? Hello!
Slob - Wine shmine, vodka is cheaper.
Geek - You drink caffeinated heart attack in a can, while trying to write humourous articles for your blog. ;)